It is that special and magical time of the year again. The time when every person is getting sick of their messes they didn’t clean up due to sheer apathy. For anyone who knows me or has seen where I live, this is a very severe undertaking. Clean the fish tank. Throw away the fifty to-go cups in my room along with the 8 cases worth of empty Ski cans. And you are chuckling under your breath because of these numbers, but don’t get me wrong. When I say these numbers, I mean them. I’m on my third garbage bag and still don’t have the superficial garbage cleaned up yet. I have a pretty bad problem when it comes to beverages. I drink gallons of liquids a day and boy does it show.
But spring cleaning means more than just cleaning up you room for the summer. This year it means getting ready to move into my first apartment. While I am more than thrilled to get out of the dorms, I am not thrilled with having to repack all of my crap to move it. I’m not moving states away. I’m not moving cities away. I am moving two freaking blocks away. Two. That’s it. And I have to pack and do all of this fun jazz for two blocks. However, I will digress.
Another lesser known form of spring cleaning is what I like to refer to as Facebook Cleaning. All it is me going down my friends list and deleting people that I just don’t care to see anymore. People from high school I no longer talk to. Random people I thought I knew but really didn’t. Ex-boyfriends and two-faced people are also deleted along with people who do nothing other than post ten million selfies.
Something that I really learned this years cleaning is that there are three main characteristics of friends that are my age. First you have the so-gushy-and-cute-you-just-want-to-puke people. These are your friends that jump started their life and are getting married and having kids. Second are the alcoholics, stoners, druggies, and bums. We all know these people. You can notice these people in high school, but their numbers will grow once you get to college. This effect is very clearly explained by my grandmother. Her theory is that you have these kids in high school that are straight A students that don’t do anything wrong. They are always coddled by their parents and led sheltered lives up till college. Then they get their long awaited first taste of freedom. They take to the parties and drink and party until they are failing adding them to the second group of Facebook friends. That leaves you with the legitimately good kids. The people who religiously study. The ones who might go to a party here and there, but much prefer more legal forms of fun such as movies, significant others, and even volunteering. Those are the three groups, but none of them are better than the others. Just like there are two sides to a coin there are two sides to each group. There are nice and trustworthy stoners/alcoholics/druggies/bumbs and there are hypocritical and two-faced “good kids”.
Coming back to spring cleaning, there is only one thing left to do once your house/apartment/room/facebook is clean. Finally I’m to the personal image part. This involves cutting hairs. Usually I would go out and get my hair cut or trimmed, but considering that I just shaved all of my hair I don’t really have much to trim yet. So I will settle with shaving and call it a day because thank God I am a male and don’t have to shave my legs.
Happy spring cleaning!